Anna needs a prom date. Contact me if you're interested.

Really, do it. She's pretty and smart and funny and a blast to be around. Prom is May 5th. She will buy your ticket, but you'll have to be the gentleman and pay for other stuff. She's not high-maintenance, though, so she'll be really easy to deal with all night. Little to no drama included. She will not sleep with you, so if that's what you have in mind, you need not apply. Anna is about 5'7" and does not particularly like being with guys who are shorter than she is. It makes her self-conscious. And you can't be old because she's seventeen. I won't even tell her about you if you are over twenty years old. If you have any friends who are also upstanding young men who happen to be free May 5th, please make them aware of the situation. All applicants fitting the description are welcome. I will let you know your standings when she and I have narrowed the choices and ranked them.

Next subject: my poor dear Panthers. I wanted to cry last night when they lost. Really, I did. I was hype about the game, and my boys let me down. It's okay though; we can pull a Cubs deal and say that there's always next year. Which there is. And Jake Delhomme is not bad--he just had a junk night. It was a terrible terrible time to have a junk night, but I truly believe that's what happened. Poor Jake. It doesn't help that Stephen Davis, DeShaun Foster, and Nick Goings were all messed up for the majority of the game. That really hindered our running game. Seattle knew that, too, and put way much extra pressure on Steve Smith. The whole combo just killed us. Jake, our running game, extra coverage on Steve, a whole bunch of junk. I was really wishing it'd be a Steelers-Panthers Super Bowl. Now it's a Steelers-Seahawks Super Bowl. At least it's alliterative. I'll be rooting for the Steelers, unfortunately. I'm resigned to it, though. Go Steelers. Woo.

Don't forget to let me know if you can go with Anna to the prom. Thanks, bye.